MOSCOW, RUSSIA – Russian political experts have likened the current U.S. peace negotiation delegation to the Three Stooges – though not the original trio.
According to a report from the Moscow Diplomatic Gazette, officials claim the present delegation is so disorganized that even Moe, Larry, and Curly Joe would have presented a tougher challenge at the bargaining table.
“At least Moe had leadership instincts,” one anonymous Kremlin insider quipped. “Larry was indecisive, but he was loyal. And Curly Joe – well, he may have been a buffoon, but he was unpredictable. This current delegation? No Moe, no leadership. No Curly Joe, no surprises. Just three guys tripping over their own talking points.”
The report also suggests that Russian negotiators have had an unusually easy time steering discussions, with one diplomat allegedly remarking, “We expected a chess match, but they brought checkers… and forgot the pieces.”
In response to the comparison, a U.S. State Department spokesperson dismissed the claims, stating, “This is unserious rhetoric from an unserious source,” before accidentally knocking over a pitcher of water and tripping on a power cable.
Sources inside the delegation, however, say they are taking the allegations seriously – so seriously, in fact, that they are currently debating which Stooge each member best represents.
* Image: empireonline.com/X.com