WASHINGTON, D.C. — In an unexpected turn of events, Apple CEO Tim Cook has shattered a highly specific and completely unofficial world record: saying “Thank you” eight times within just two minutes during a tech leaders dinner at the White House.
Witnesses report that Cook’s gratitude reached such speed and precision that several audience members began clapping in rhythm, unsure if they were attending a tech launch or a gratitude-themed improvisational show.
The record-breaking moment occurred during his speech, just after unveiling Apple’s latest update that promised “more rounded corners than ever before.” Cook reportedly leaned forward, smiled warmly, and proceeded to “thank you” his way into history.
“It was magical,” said one tech leader who also attended the dinner. “I came here to meet President Trump and other tech leaders, but instead I saw a man demolish the thank-you barrier.”
The Guinness World Records team, while not officially recognizing “most thank-yous in two minutes,” admitted they were “impressed and slightly confused.”
A spokesperson explained, “Normally, our records involve measurable feats like tallest pancake stack or fastest marathon. But hey, if Tim Cook wants to blaze a new category in polite repetition, who are we to stop him?”
Apple fans, meanwhile, have already begun requesting a “Thank You” counter app for the Apple Watch.
Rival tech leaders were quick to respond. Elon Musk tweeted, “I could say ‘You’re welcome’ 12 times in one minute. Just saying.”
Satya Nadella of Microsoft remained diplomatic, noting, “We at Microsoft also value gratitude, though our version integrates seamlessly with Outlook.”
As for Cook, he remained humble in victory, offering one final message as he left the stage: “Thank you. Seriously, thank you. And also… thank you.”
You can see the historic world record breaking moment here:
*Image: X.com/@firstadopter